night in rodanthe

I watched this movie few years ago and loved it, i remember how i am moved to tears when i watched it.

"I never thought that I
Had anymore to give
You're pushing me so far
Here I am without you

Drink to all that we have lost
Mistakes we have made
Everything will change
But love remains the same"

something to ponder..

"We are all dreaming of some magical rose garden over the horizon-instead of enjoying the roses that are blooming outside our windows today."

In life, so often we neglect people around us who really loves and care for us, we take them for granted, ignoring their needs. Instead, with the advance technology, we find ourself asking people we had never met from our online games or social networks how is their day, greeting them and sending them sweet emoji and mails...but, have we ever ponder, when was the last time we ever say something nice to people close to us...may it be our girlfriend, boyfriend, parents or someone dear, when was the last time you tell him/her you love him/her. How would they felt to discover that you actually care for a stranger more than you care for him/her.

p.s.: i had personally experienced it, discovering my ex sending mail and calling up various gals (aka sttranger) he hook up with on social netwrk every other day, showing his concern and care for them...when he cnt even b bothered with me...pathetic

something to smile about..specially for paddy :)

Today you and I may face difficult things, hard situations, and challenging relationships.  None of these offer anything to smile about...but sometimes little things in my everyday life makes me smile :) , it could be a stupid comedy drama i am watching (i usually laugh like crazy rather than merely a smile), a mail in my haypi inbox (may it be a blowing kiss or hate mail), seeing someone falling dwn in a silly manner (lol i sounds mean ;D) having someone to talk to and think about (its a blessing)...this morning, i smile after reading the skype msg u left me last evening.

something i read to share with ya :)

Smile
She smiled at a sorrowful stranger.
The smile seemed to make him feel better.
He remembered past kindness of a friend
And wrote him a thank you letter.
The friend was so pleased with the thank-you
That he left a large tip after lunch.
The waitress, surprised by the size of the tip,
Bet the whole thing on a hunch.
The next day she picked up her winnings,
And gave part to a man on the street.
The man on the street was grateful;
For two days he'd had nothing to eat.
After he finished his dinner,
He left for his small dingy room.
(he didn't know at that moment
that he might be facing his doom)
On the way he picked up a shivering puppy
And took him home to get warm.
The puppy was very grateful
To be in out of the storm.
That night the house caught on fire
The puppy barked the alarm.
He barked till he woke the whole household
And saved everybody from harm.
One of the boys that he rescued
Grew up to be President.
All this because of a simple smile
That hadn't cost a cent.
--frm "Chicken Soup for the Teenage Soul"

healing

i am proud of myself, for 2 weeks i have not taken any initiative to try talk to him unless its about work, didn't even bothers if he turns up for work, and though i can't say i had totally deleted him from my mind altogether...since he is not helping at all >.< with a call from him last weekend asking me out and breakfast that he placed on my desk yesterday...but i know i woudn't be taken in anymore and i don't want to either.

New events gonna replaced old memories, someone's true heart gonna heal me where it hurts, though it always take times for those ugly scar to fade. i know i am healing...

p.s. special thks to riyan who sings  to me at my loneliest moment

:D

had a medicure done yesterday nite after work and did not realised that hving a fake nail which is jus slightly longer than my current nail will actually affect some of my daily routine lol. realised the power of google cause i actually learn how to remove my contact lens with my long nails by googling. yipee...all gd

sail away

this song now has a special meaning : )




<3 @ 23Apr, 14:55hrs

fear

i fear getting too attached, thus having expectation and end up only in disappointment.

grrrrrrrr

At the traffic light junction on my way home last night...
  thatguy : where shall we head off first
  thatgal : bookstore or supermarket
  thatguy : let's go to the bookstore first than the supermarket
thatgal smiles, they hold hands and cross the road.

i was standing next to this couple and suddenly i felt all so lonely >.<

wondering

sometimes i can't help but wonder, was your sms ever genuine
sometimes i can't help but wonder, when did u begin to even care

pretty women make men dumb

Time to share, I read this article on the web and thought it was interesting...

The study: McMaster University researchers Margo Wilson and Martin Daly wanted to find out if sexual mood influenced discounting behavior. They showed 209 male and female students pictures of attractive and not-so-attractive people of the opposite sex. Each was then offered a chance to win a prize. They could accept a check for between $15 and $35 tomorrow or one for $50 to $75 at some point in the future.

The results for the men: After a man viewed pictures of women who were of average attractiveness, they made a rational decision about the prize money and accepted the larger amount to be received in the future. But when they had just seen pictures of beautiful women, they discounted the future value of the reward in an irrational way and opted instead for the immediate and smaller cash outlay. In other words, after seeing a very attractive woman, the men were more likely to make dumb choices.

The results for the women: Viewing the photographs of men--whether they were sexy hunks or just run-of-the-mill guys--had no effect on women's ability to make rational decisions.

"This study really is just showing scientifically what marketers already know."..."That beautiful women in advertisements induce men to spend.”

yay new screen!!

I finally got a brand new screen after tolerating with the flikering screen for 3 weeks. :) 

lol, no excuse to not work harder at work now :p

What's ur size

This made me laugh, and i wanna share my laughter.

And this is not meant for the size of guys errrr...u knw lah :P

teddies' hug

Teddies dont hug back,
But sometimes they are all you have got

find back myself

"Today, I am a person so much different to whom I am 3 years ago, I don’t and can’t remember how it feels anymore to be truly happy, smile on my face has faded and all I have bottomed inside me is tears, pain and anguish."

From now on, i wanna find back myself

Out of my life

Since you have already left,
So pls, spare me the agony and stop lingering

All i wanted is to have you out of my mind
All i wanted is for you to walk out of my life
All i wanted is to move on with my life

reading

Really been a while since i last read a book, a novel ,been thinking if i should start picking up a book again, it may be good food for my mind and my lonely soul.
let's see...

Btw, added music to this space, thought that would make this space a less lonely place :)

loneliness

Because loneliness is sometimes our only company...

yellow

Thats the song you said remind you of me, and it's still the song playing as my ring tone currently.
Troi, this is what i wanna for you...which is..be strong

Be strong, live long
Always be true to yourself
Right wrongs, sing songs
I am praying for your health

Be strong, keep it real
I know you will succeed
Hold your head up high
You have got all that you need

Be strong, keep it real
Life goes so fast it is like a race
But even when the pace is toe-to-heel
I still wanna see a smile on your face

With your dreams you are making progress
You are an inspiration to your friends
Peace, I love you my dear friend
I am in your corner till the end
For yourself, sasha, and those who love you...be strong.

you send me the above image once again today, dang, why wanna make me a cruel fuking witch having to tell you this. "we both knw, it wouldn't work, so i am sorry i can't be your penguin"
dammit, i wanna the best for you, pls be strong.
but bear in mind, i still care and i am still your friend.

p.s. i hope i could see u pop in here every now n then, i would knw once there is a visit from cali

hmmm...

"I never needed to get revenge in order to become whole again. Hurting you wouldn't make me feel any better, because I simply didn't care about you anymore. You broke my heart, made me feel like shit, and then did it again. Now all I see are those wasted years with you, the time spent waiting for you to show you cared." -- lelove blogspot

hard times

hard times, they last too long
In fact it would seem at times,
they are never ending,
or that at the very least,
they never completely disappear.
Hard times are still marching on.
Sometimes we forget they're there,
but they rest beneath the surface of our temporary peace and serenity,
always bound to resurface.
Always.

Even in good times, hard times persist.

Even in joy, pain still exists.

WTF

I should have known life was never kind to me

I should have closed the door to my heart and not be hopeful

I should have admited to fate that life is fucked up

Felt a pinched of my heart

Feel like crying right now

Freedom

I smell real freedom
Yet i felt empty inside

Pix: forbidden freedom from fotofocus

Freedom to live and freedom to die
freedom to laugh and freedom to cry.
Freedom to speak and freedom to listen
freedom to act based on a wise decision.

Freedom from hate and freedom of love
freedom of below and freedom of above.
Freedom of the past and freedom of the present
freedom of the future and what it can represent.

Freedom from wrong and freedom being right
freedom of the day and freedom of the night.
Freedom to choose and freedom to reject
freedom to imagine what there is to expect.

Freedom from lust and freedom from greed
freedom from anger and freedom from breed.
Freedom from jealousy and freedom from pride
freedom from within and freedom from outside.
Freedom of always not having anything to hide.

Freedom from space and also freedom from time
freedom from attachment and freedom from crime
Freedom to work and freedom to play
freedom to believe and freedom to pray.
Freedom to experience a rebirth someday.

Freedom from the body and freedom from the mind
freedom from the ego and freedom from being blind.
Freedom of transcendance being of the spiritual kind.

-by George Krokos (i abstract only portion of what i felt)

for you

this post is for you...

when i first received the song u sent me, i was touched first by the song's title. I remember i listened to it at the back seat of a taxi on my way home..

The best thing 'bout tonight's that we're not fighting
Could it be that we have been this way before?
I know you don't think that I am trying
I know you're wearing thin down to the core

But hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night
That I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find

This is not what I intended
I always swore to you I'd never fall apart
You always thought that I was stronger
I may have failed, but I have loved you from the start

Oh, but hold your breath
Because tonight will be the night
That I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
It's impossible

So breathe in so deep
Breathe me in, I'm yours to keep
And hold on to your words 'cause talk is cheap
And remember me tonight when you're asleep

Because tonight will be the night
That I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find

Tonight will be the night
That I will fall for you over again
Don't make me change my mind

Or I won't live to see another day
I swear it's true
Because a girl like you is impossible to find
You're impossible to find

I listen carefully to the lyrics as it plays, tears swim in my eyes.
I used to believe love is true, i used to believe it works wonder, but my experienced told me otherwise or is it just that love itself hates me to the core.
I am glad there is still someone out there who cares, who think i am worth more than a trash, yet i can't bring myself to believe love could be so kind.


p.s. rp, i really love this song and thks for being so sweet.

happiness vs misery

happiness is just for a second, but misery seems forever

always wonder why happiness never seems to last
always ponder why misery wouldn't just leave me alone